Requiem Emotions
by God'srider
Summary: The show left missing scenes out of the episode Requiem. This is a fic mostly about Gibbs' feelings and the emotions he has to come to grips with. Bad summary! slight Tiva; mainly Gibbs/Tony father/son
1. Chapter 1

**Here is another story I am starting! I thought there were some ripple effects and missing scenes from the episode Requiem!! **

**Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS!**

**Please enjoy and let me know what you think!!**

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Even though Gibb knew the only chance to get away semi-unharmed was with the car, he wished there was another way. After Maddie was in the vehicle, Gibbs threw the car in reverse and accelerated. Too late did he realize the car wouldn't stop in time and then they were in the air.

Plunging into the murky water, the car dove into the depths sending Gibbs into a rush of actions. As cold water began plunging into the vehicle, Gibbs noticed terror gripping Maddie and reassuredly said, "Stay calm, Maddie." While she nodded jerkily, Gibbs alternated between unbuckling her and trying to force his door open.

After Maddie was free from her seatbelt, her focus on Gibbs faded into black as she lost consciousness. Gibbs kept trying to get out from underneath the jarred steering wheel, but he was stuck. Taking his last breath before the car filled all the way up, he frantically searched for a way to save Maddie. The recurring though pounded in his head, "Maddie could not die young like his Kelly."

Noticing a rush of bubbles scattering through the water, Gibbs strained to see out the windshield. Relief flooded him as Tony swam toward him. After Tony tried yanking Gibbs' door opened, he moved to the windshield cracking it with his fist and sliding it away. Quickly, Gibbs pushed Maddie to Tony and saw him carry her toward the surface.

Helplessly, Gibbs watched Tony disappear in the dark green water leaving him stuck alone in the sunk vehicle. His earlier relief was replaced by past regrets. Feeling his lungs burn as the last oxygen began leaving his breath, memories bombarded him with all the things he left unsaid to the people he considered his family.

The most vivid regret clenched his heart. He had never built the courage to tell Tony, his senior agent, that he was proud of him and considered him a son no matter his goofy flaws. The last thought before his vision blurred to black was the prayer that Tony knew his worth and the whole team knew that Gibbs really did love them.

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Gibbs' eyelids twitched and he forced his eyes open to take in his surrounding, knowing he was dead. Instead, he looked into Maddie's sweet face looking back at him. With all his energy, he reached over and squeezed Maddie's hand before his eyes moved to look at his soaking agent kneeling next to him. Tony was breathing heavily staring up at the blue sky.

Gibbs moved to sit up, but felt a strong hand on his shoulder, "Catch your breath, Boss." Tony sucked a breath of his own before continuing, "I'll find a phone and get my car to take you both back to headquarters."

"Have the team bring us clothes, we'll stay until the crime scene is investigated." Gibbs gave Tony a look warning him no to argue.

Standing up, Tony replied, "Fine, but don't move. I'll be back." Without waiting for a reply, Tony jogged into the large building. Gibbs decided to obey the younger agent since he had saved them. In a matter of minutes, Tony was back with the car. He had managed to open the side gate and pull the car to where it wouldn't ruin the crime scene. Lifting Maddie into the car, Tony wrapped a towel around her that he had found in the garage.

Gibbs let Tony help him up and accepted the towel he tossed him. At the car, Tony pulled a dry change of clothes out of his bag and rushed off to change leaving Gibbs smirking. He recalled multiple instances that had led to Tony always having a spare outfit in his backpack.

After a moment of stillness, Gibbs got out of the car and opened Maddie's door. She stood up and fell into Gibbs' strong hug allowing him to whisper in her ear, "We're okay." Kissing her on the temple, Gibbs said, "Maddie, you were my daughter's best friend. Now I consider you my daughter so if you ever need anything, call me. Thanks for…" Gibbs hesitated to say the tender words that brought tears to his eyes. He took a breath and continued, "Thanks for reminding me that Kelly had a life no matter how short and for letting me help you. You can't replace Kelly, but you're like my daughter and always will remind me of her."

Maddie looked into Gibbs' fatherly eyes and replied quietly, "Thanks for sharin that with me and for helping me. Thanks for letting me be your daughter's best friend and now considering me your own daughter. It…" Maddie paused to swallow and blink her tears away, "means a lot that you care about me."

Gibbs held Maddie securely in his arms as she sobbed silently. The shock of the events of the day and the pain from losing her best friend sent tears streaming down her cheeks as Gibbs held her in a fatherly embrace.

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**PLEASE REVEIW!!!! Chapter two will hopefully be up fairly soon!**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2- I like the idea, but the chapter isn't very good so sorry!**

**I don't own NCIS becuase I wouldn't just be writing stories for it if I did.**

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Gibbs stood waiting impatiently for his team to arrive as his earlier thoughts invaded his mind. Since he had in fact lived through the watery situation, Gibbs no longer felt the urgency to tell Tony his true feelings. Standing in the cold weather, he convinced himself that Tony knew his own worth and didn't need to hear it from him.

Tony was confident and had to know his potential, he always seemed like the king of pride too. So Gibbs decided to deny his earlier fatherly feelings and once again buried his emotions. Gibbs came back to reality as the team parked the truck outside the gate.

Ducky, Palmer, McGee, and Ziva all made their way over to Gibbs. McGee extended two NCIS t-shirts and two pairs of gray sweatpants to Gibbs and he in turn passed one of the outfits to Maddie. After they both had changed, Ducky checked them over despite Gibbs' grumbling.

When Ducky had finished his examinations, everyone moved as a group over to the first dead body. Ducky bent to start his routine with Palmer's assistance. Instantly, Gibbs said, "Time of death, Duck?"

Ducky looked at Gibbs exasperated by his impatience.

Awkwardly stepping forward, Tony answered, "I can help with that. He has about four bullets in his chest and he," Tony pointed to the other dead man, "has probably about the same."

The group stared at Tony with gaping mouths astonished at what Tony's answer implied. After what seemed like forever, Gibbs looked away from Tony and commanded, "McGee bag and tag, Ziva shoot and sketch, Tony help Ziva." With a hand he dismissed the team to do their jobs and he turned to leave the group.

Changing his course, Gibbs approached Tony at the back of the truck, "keys." After a second of confusion, Tony pulled the car keys out of his pocket and tossed them to his boss. "I'll be back. Tony, don't slack off while I'm gone."

Gibbs made his way over to Maddie rethinking his comment. He wanted to hide the emotions from inside the car and in doing so the harsh words to Tony just came out. Shaking his head at himself, Gibbs took Maddie home.

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Ziva saw the pained look flash in Tony's eyes at Gibbs' comment. When McGee had gone to gather evidence, Ziva said, "You did good, Tony." Pursing her lips, Ziva looked at Tony's clear green eyes and hesitated. Although their partnership was close and honest, she still weighed the thoughts she wanted to voice.

Tony watched indecision pass Ziva's beautiful features and knew she was struggling with how to say what she wanted him to know. Despite his mood, he felt happiness knowing that Ziva was closest to him and they shared such a close friendship amidst their partnership.

Ziva deciding to be blunt lilted, "I am not surprised as the others seem to be that you performed exceptionally. I can tell exactly what happened and your reactions must have been remarkable."

Pretending to brush the comment off, he said, "You would have done better." A jealous look colored his bright eyes giving the comment a bitter tone.

Since they were basically transparent to each other, Ziva could tell Tony was hurt by everyone's lack of confidence in him. She only wished that he could forget them and see that she believed in him. Laying a soft hand on Tony's shoulder, she stared into his doubting eyes, "They believe in you, Tony and are proud of you."

Clenching his fists, Tony mumbled, "Then why do they treat me like I'm incapable of doing anything right?" He ran a frustrated hand through his hair and turned to leave.

Before he could, Ziva grabbed his wrist and caused him to half-turn to her. "They are blind to your true feelings about yourself and do not realize what they cause you." They searched each other's eyes, Ziva saw the pain swimming in his, but was surprised to also find deep emotions directed to her.

Tony saw the emotion she often tried to hide from him. He knew she was scared of falling in love with him because he felt the same way about her. Ziva had always been there for him even with the whole Jeanne situation.

Ziva nearly whispered, "I believe in you, Tony." She let her hand slide from his wrist thinking she may have crossed their invisible boundary.

Tony quietly responded, "Thanks for understanding me, Zi." Bending toward her, Tony lightly brushed his lips across her hair in a soft kiss that told her everything she needed to know. That one kiss told her that Tony would tell her his true feelings toward her and she was happy with that.

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Before long, they were all back at NCIS headquarters to admit evidence and write reports. In a group they entered the bull pen causing Abby to leap from McGee's chair. She flung her arms around Gibbs and held him tight. Gibbs patted her patiently until she stepped back and declared, "Let's hear the whole story, campfire."

Lacking Abby's enthusiasm, everyone got their chairs and met in the middle. Ducky and Palmer found some neighboring office chairs that had been abandoned and Abby plunked down on McGee.

Gibbs began, "Well, of course, I figured it out and went to her apartment for the mail and then to retrieve the money. After I called them, we set up a meeting place. When I got there, they wanted all of the money not half." Gibbs paused to look at the surprised faces of the team.

They were all listening intently especially since Gibbs rarely talked so much at one time.

Gibbs continued, "So as I tossed them the keys to my trunk and started to fight them. There was no way to escape except the car and too late did I find out we wouldn't stop in time. So as we sunk to the bottom of the water, I thought we were both as good as dead since the doors were stuck shut. Then Tony came and did his job."

Tony dropped his head at Gibbs' denoting wrap up of his actions, but recovered quickly, "Hey, I gotta do it sometime." His comment caused the whole group to either grin or laugh except Ziva, who looked at Tony sympathetically.

After the humor passed, Abby said, "Tony fill in the blanks."

Putting on his confidence act, tony said, "Well, I pulled up and saw Boss man fly into the bay so I ran into the garage, shot the two bad guys like I was James Bond. Then I tossed my gun and dove into the freezing water. Boss passed me Maddie and I brought her up. Then I got Gibbs and the rest is obvious."

Abby jumped to Tony and wrapped him in a hug, "Thanks, Tony. "

Tony tried to hug her back as best as he could, but Abby had his arms pinned in her hug. Once Abby had released him, Gibbs said, "Write your reports so we can go home."

Obediently everyone scattered. Of course, McGee finished first and he hurried out with Abby. Tony and Ziva actually finished at the same time and they gathered their stuff to leave. In the elevator they looked at each other before smirking lightly.

Tony took her hand, "Can we talk."

"Not tonight, it is late. Tomorrow yes?" Ziva asked and smiled at him. He nodded his agreement as they reached the ground floor. Ziva made up an excuse, "Oh, I forgot something upstairs. I will see you tomorrow."

"Do you want me to wait for you?" Tony frowned thinking he probably should.

"No, Tony. I will be fine. Thank you." Ziva sent him a small smile before reentering the elevator and waved at Tony as the door shut.

Ziva walked back into the office to see Gibbs' desk light glowing. He sat with his chin in his hand staring blankly in front of him.

Bravely, she stood in front of his desk and started talking, "You may be able to hide your inner conflict from the others, but not from me."

Gibbs squinted up at her. "Ziver, there is no inner conflict." He tried to deny what Ziva was implying and what he knew was true.

"Do not lie, Gibbs." She stared at her boss before saying the two simple words, "Tell him." As she reached the end of their office, she turned back and added, "He needs to know."

Gibbs sat at his desk for about half an hour more before gathering his gear and heading for the elevator.

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	3. Chapter 3

**Hey, everyone! Please enjoy!**

**I do not own NCIS, but wish I did! If anyone would like to discuss the season 7 premiere, let me know! I think it was awesome!**

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Gibbs flipped the switch to illuminate his basement and reveal his current boat project. After making his way down the stairs, he picked up his sandpaper. Stroking the wood with the direction of the grain, Gibbs tried to relax after all this was his ultimate activity to unwind.

The more he tried to forget the days' events and emotions, the more the memories bombarded his thoughts. He had almost died yet again today. Tony had saved his life and he hadn't even given him so much as a thank you.

Despite the bad aspects of the day, one good thing had come from it. He and Maddie were reunited and were as close as father and daughter. Their relationship would always be special because they could share their grief over the loss of Kelly.

Although Gibbs had been trying to save Maddie, he had almost got her killed in the process. Once again Tony invaded his thoughts. Not only had the agent saved Gibbs and Maddie from drowning, he had killed the bad guys, wrote his report, and helped investigate.

Gibbs tried to avoid his nagging gut that was telling him to tell Tony how much he meant to him. Arguing with himself, Gibbs thought his senior field agent had to already know he was a valuable part of the team, an outstanding agent, and an all around great guy. He was talented and never let anyone forget it.

However underneath his confidence, Gibbs had always expected self-doubt and insecurity. They had worked together for years and rarely did Gibbs dish out a compliment or praise him. Thinking back he realized each time he did, Tony always seemed to perk up a bit more and walk with a little more bounce in his step.

Shaking his head at the regrets that were seeping into his conscious yet again, Gibbs continued to sand his boat. Ziva's words echoed in his head, "Tell him, he needs to know."

If anyone really knew Tony and his deepest thoughts, it was Ziva. She would know if Tony needed to hear him speak his feelings to him. Gibbs suspected the two were falling for each other and suspected Rule 12 was close to causing an issue if it wasn't already. That thought brought a silent smirk to his features.

The words resounded through him again. Gibbs tried to block the persistent words out of his mind, he didn't want to share his feelings. He never told anyone about the majority of his feelings. He kept most of his life fairly private despite the close relationship with his team.

Once again Ziva's voice resounded in his brain and Gibbs knew he would inevitably telling DiNozzo the truth. After nearly an hour more of sanding his boat, Jenny, he made his way up the stairs and headed to bed. Three hours later, Gibbs lay staring at the ceiling unable to clear his mind enough to bring sleep. The memories continued to invade his thoughts.

Rolling his eyes, Gibbs swung his feet out of bed at four in the morning and grabbed his cell phone. He had to tell Tony or he could never return to his life to normal or as normal as his life ever got anyway. Darn DiNozzo. Gibbs gut was telling him to tell Tony and he always followed his gut.

Hitting speed dial two, Gibbs held the phone up to his ear. Tony's groggy voice answered on the second ring, "Hello."

"DiNozzo, we need to talk."

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	4. Chapter 4

**This is the final chapter of Requiem!! I hope you all enjoy it and check out my other stories!!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own NCIS.......*sigh***

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"Hey, DiNozzo." Gibbs greeted his senior field agent in his normal deliberate manner.

Trying to clear his sleep fogged mind, Tony asked, "We got a case, Boss?"

Gibbs fought the embarrassment at speaking his next words to Tony, "No, I need to talk to you."

Stifling a yawn, Tony responded, "Alright, shoot."

"Not on the phone. Can you meet in twenty minutes in the bull pen?"Gibbs could gear rustling as Tony got out of his bed.

"Sure, Boss. Be there in fifteen." His mouth hung open when he actually heard Gibbs say, "Bye," before hanging up the phone.

Ten minutes later, Tony pulled off the freeway to drive into the NCIS parking lot. His mind had been racing ever since Gibbs' call. What was so important that they had to talk at four in the morning face to face?

Multiple thoughts had struck him, but the most paralyzing were still gripping him. "What if something had happened to one of the team members or to Abby or Ducky? Gibbs hadn't sounded distressed or sad just worried and almost urgent.

Tony parked and wondered if Gibbs was quitting again and wanted to let him know ahead of time. What if Gibbs was firing him? Had he done anything unusually wrong lately?

Tony walked into the building trying to stop his thoughts of terrible possibilities. He made his way into the bull pen and saw Gibbs stand up from his desk.

Smiling timidly, Tony looked at his Boss and saw uncertainty flash in his blue eyes. "Hey, Boss. Uh, what's going on?"

Gibbs smirked at his agent's apparent confusion and suspicion, "Thanks for coming Tony."

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"No problem, I wasn't doing anything important," Tony teased and was rewarded with a humored grin from the stoic Gibbs.

"Well, tony I couldn't wait or I'd lose it completely."

Mischievously, Tony smirked and responded, "Boss, I was never really sure you had it." Gibbs nodded his head acknowledging the truth in Tony's teasing.

Standing next to Tony, Gibbs looked extremely vulnerable compared to his normal tough exterior. "Tony I have a more serious subject in mind."

"Okay, Boss. You are kinda scaring me." Tony looked at the older agent searching for some sort of clue.

"I, uh," Gibbs rubbed the back of his neck, "I have some things I need to tell you that I have been scared to say before, but today I figured I never know when it will be too late."

Sensing the seriousness of the conversation coming, Tony just stood silently waiting for his Boss to continue. Taking another breath, Gibbs kept taking, "First off, Thanks for uh," Gibbs cleared his throat in frustration, "saving Maddie and me today."

Averting his eyes to the floor, Tony replied, "It's no big deal, Boss. You would have done the same for me."

Realizing just how humble an agent Tony was, Gibbs tapped the back of his head before squeezing his shoulder in a fatherly manner, "It is a big deal, Tony and you did a fine job. I don't think I have ever been so proud and thankful for one of my agents ever before. You were efficient and you saved our lives."

In awe that his Boss was using so many words just to thank him, Tony made eye contact. Gibbs steely gaze saw Tony's doubt and he continued to drive his gratitude into Tony until the young agent believed Gibbs was sincere. "Tony, I would be in a wooden box right now ready for my burial. Maddie would have died young just like Kelly." At speaking his daughter's name, Gibbs looked away pain coloring his eyes and guilt tingeing his voice.

"You're welcome, Boss."Tony voiced his thoughts seeing that Gibbs needed a second to recover from his statement. "I saw the car go into the water and adrenaline pumped into me. All I could think was get Gibbs and Maddie before it's too late."

Each of them soaked in the other's confessions for a few moments before DiNozzo broke the silence, "Boss, you didn't have to tell me all that. I know."

Shaking his head, Gibbs fixed his gaze on Tony, "I don't think you do, DiNozzo. That is why I had to tell you." He grabbed Tony's neck and pulled him closer so their foreheads were nearly touching, "Tony, you are worth so much more than you give yourself credit for."

Tony tried not to make eye contact with his Boss, "Yeah, that's why my dad always treated me so great and I have so many real friends."

Disbelief gripped Gibbs, all this time Tony had been his agent and he had never really realized how hurt Tony was from the past and how unsure of himself he really was. The shock showed in his eyes and millions of things to say to the young man rushed through his head. He simply asked, "You don't think anyone likes you just because of that?"

Pain flashed in Tony's eyes, but anger quickly drowned the pain out, "Gibbs, it's fairly obvious," a dry laughed sounded from him, "My old frat friends are hardly considered friends since the only thing they only hang out with me when there is alcohol involved, which I have tried to stop doing. I have to try so hard to make people like me."

Gibbs eyebrows shot together, "Then they aren't worth it anyway, DiNozzo. You don't have to try hard at all."

"Save it, Boss. Don't give me a feel good talk. I have to try to make people laugh and try to be charming. So yeah I boss I have to try." Tony looked determined and emptiness had surfaced in his green eyes.

Gibbs' voice was serious and authoritative. "Tony, stop telling yourself that. You are naturally funny and people that matter do like you. I know you have at least five real friends because Ducky and Palmer are your friends. McGee looks up to you and Ziva is your friend too.

"You are a great agent and a great guy and you don't even realize it. None of my other agents have stuck around me as loyally as you have, Tony."

As Gibbs paused to think, Tony jumped in with his self doubt, "That is why everyone is always so astonished when I do something right because I'm a great agent." Sarcasm laced his words and his anger put a bitter edge to them.

Astonishment continued to hit Gibbs full force at how little Tony believed in himself. Longing to get his point across, Gibbs said, "You are the best agent I have seen in a long time, DiNozzo. Stop selling yourself short." Bringing a strong hand down on Tony's shoulder, he continued, "Tony, I am proud of you and I am proud to have you on my team and I am proud to be your leader."

Tony looked dumbstruck from the honesty from his normally introverted Boss. Wanting to believe what Gibbs was telling him, but not quite ready to believe it Tony accused, "Then why don't you ever say it, Gibbs?"

Taken slightly aback from Tony's question, he tried to think of an excuse. Coming up empty he responded, "Tony, I honestly don't know. I guess I thought you knew! I am sorry I never told you, Tony."

With a mischievous grin in place Tony said, "Don't apologize it's a sign of weakness."

Rolling his eyes at Tony's ability to bounce back, Gibbs said, "There are always exceptions to my rules and don't tell anyone I said that."

Tony laughed, "I won't forget it, but I will keep it as a Rule#4."

"Tony, I am serious though. I am proud of you. You're like the son I've never had and the agent I've always wanted on my team because now you're trained so well I barely have to talk to you until tonight that is."

The rare emotional side of Tony overtook him, "Thanks for, uh telling me everything tonight, Boss. I needed to hear it."

"You're welcome DiNozzo, you're welcome." He patted his agent's back.

His humor resurfaced and Tony teased, "Hey, Boss, Can I call you dad?" A well known hand connected with the back of his head in response as Gibbs smirked at Tony.

Gibbs moved toward the elevator leading to autopsy, as Tony got comfortable in his chair for a nap. "Tony, one more thing."

"Yeah, Boss." Tony looked apprehensive.

"I have another rule exception for you," he paused until Tony nodded in anticipation, "forget Rule#12, DiNozzo, but be smart!" Seeing the shocked look on Tony's face he added, "I might miss some of your emotions, but I'm not blind!"

Gibbs smiled as he entered the elevator leaving behind a giddy DiNozzo. He felt the relief of honesty wash over him. He and Tony were closer than ever and now he could sleep peacefully. Entering Autopsy, he rolled up a towel and laid down on an examining table to sleep.

Smiling Tony leaned back in his chair, he didn't think Gibbs had ever talked to him so much before not even in a whole week. He felt giddy about everything that had happened between them and truly felt like he finally had a father. On top of all that, the best thing was, Gibbs had given him permission to date Ziva. Tony closed his eyes preparing to nap until 7 and with a grin in place he fell asleep knowing he was loved and wanted.

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